Let’s start this all over

Let’s start this all over

don’t know what’s right and what’s real anymore
I don’t know how I’m meant to feel anymore
When do you think it will all become clear
Cuz I’m being taken over by the fear

*Lily Allen – The Fear

It’s been a while since I posted anything on the blog and the reason behind this, is that I couldn’t manage to pull myself together in order to write anything that I considered to be somewhat meaningful. Nothing made sense and everything seemed shallow and unreal.

My life recently has been an emotional roller coaster and I realized that everything came to this point because of my own decisions that I made in the past years. I’ve had periods when I blamed everything on other people and I couldn’t see that my lack of confidence was in fact something that I have burden myself with, all out of fear of failure.

Always playing on the safe side of things has led me to a place where my rational decisions made me feel unfulfilled. Being safe is good but not when you have bigger, bolder dreams. Taking risks was never something I was keen on, but is something that I definitely need to change. The fear of being judged or not being good enough has made me over-analyze everything.

I needed a break to clear my head and start enjoying real life more but now  I am back, with a purpose and a clearer view of what I need to do. Hope I will have the right energy to change my ways for the better. Everyday is a struggle but sometimes  even the bad decisions make up for better stories than the safe or  “what if”  ones.
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2 Comments

  1. Iulia

    “The fear of being judged or not being good enough has made me over-analyze everything.” – I sooo feel you on this one. Exact in locul ăla dark sunt si eu acum și mă lupt cu disperare să ies la lumină…
    Îți doresc să ai putere să-ti învingi temerile pentru că tu ești o adevărată inspiratie si trebuie sa fii out there for the whole world to see. ?

  2. STEPHANINE

    Inteleg perfect prin ce treci pentru ca simt acelasi lucru de aproximativ 3 ani. Cred ca ti-ar prinde bine sa incerci yoga, pe mine ma ajuta (nu-s ‘vindecata’ inca, dar ma simt usor mai bine). *sending happy thoughts*

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